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Today I have a painful civic duty to perform. Mindful of my obligation to snitch on friends, family and neighbours who break the law — a duty impressed upon the country by no less a personage than the Health Secretary, Matt ‘Captain Mainwaring’ Hancock — I feel I have no choice but to declare a … Read more
Nothing quite prepared me for the barrage of abuse I walked into when I reported a few months ago that Mrs U was agitating to move from London to the countryside. In normal circumstances, as I’ve admitted before, I choose not to read the comments people append to my articles on the internet. Some, I … Read more
Ever anxious to look on the bright side, today I draw your attention to one of the few cheery aspects of lockdown and the Rule of Six. True, the edicts flowing from Whitehall and local authorities may be crippling the economy, throwing millions out of work, seizing up the health service, condemning the elderly to … Read more
There are pickpockets, petty thieves and wide-boy conmen. Then there are bank robbers, serial fraudsters and international money launderers. Finally, at the very bottom of this hellish pit of iniquity, you’ll find the country’s big‑name insurance companies. How they must gloat as they exploit reputations for integrity, built up decades ago when you could still find … Read more
On the face of it, the transvestite ceramic artist Grayson Perry is one of the least likely people in all the world to say anything even mildly complimentary about Right-wingers. I don’t say this just because he likes to dress up in women’s clothes — although the Left, if you’ll pardon a generalisation, tends to … Read more
Frankly, I blame Barbara for initiating me into the cult of Apple and sparking an addiction I’ve been unable to shake off since. It was six years ago this autumn when the PA, whose services I shared with a handful of colleagues, took one look at the antiquated mobile phone I’d been allocated by my … Read more
Over the past few days, I’ve thought often of the opening scene in an episode of Telegoons, the BBC’s less than wholly successful 1960s TV adaptation of the young Prince Charles’s favourite radio programme, The Goon Show. The scene in question begins as night falls with Henry Crun, a puppet voiced by Peter Sellers, lighting the … Read more
Since this column last appeared three weeks ago, my family has been blessed with two great causes for celebration. The first, on July 25, was my revered mother-in-law’s 98th birthday. Then, three days later, at 5.45 am, our daughter-in-law was safely delivered of our first granddaughter — an exceptionally beautiful baby girl (and I say this … Read more
Insurance tycoon Neil Utley set to reap a £70m windfall as consortium of investors prepares to buy Hastings By Lucy White For The Daily Mail Published: 21:51 BST, 5 August 2020 | Updated: 21:51 BST, 5 August 2020 £70m windfall: Hastings insurance boss Neil Utley Insurance tycoon Neil Utley is set to rake more than … Read more
As I write, I’m sitting at an enormous mahogany desk in my oak-panelled, book-lined study, attired in formal evening dress. My starched shirt-front, dazzlingly white, is as stiff as a sheet of tin. You can see your face in my patent-leather shoes, polished to a brilliant shine. My black tie and matching cummerbund are spun from … Read more