Nicola Roberts reveals therapy has given her ‘self-love’ to avoid toxic relationships

Nicola Roberts has revealed a year of therapy has given her the ‘self-love’ and ‘self-respect’ to avoid toxic relationships after seeking counselling over her stalker ex.

The Masked Singer winner, 34, candidly spoke to Laura Whitmore on her Castaway podcast where she discussed everything from life to Girls Aloud.

Nicola revealed earlier this year she underwent a year of trauma therapy as a result of the five years of hell she went through at the hands of her stalker ex-boyfriend.  

Talking about her therapy experience, Nicola said: ‘You’ve got to be your own best friend. I had a year of therapy. 

‘I swear to God, I went in that with a certain level of self-love but not enough to keep me out of bad relationships, not enough to try and save people who were toxic for me, not enough to recognise when something was bad to walk away. 

‘But I left that year with the most almighty amount of self-love and self-respect and that comes before everything, every relationship, every friendship, everything and your relationship with yourself.’

The star’s ex, former soldier Carl Davies, whom she met in 2007 and dated for 18 months before ending it after a series of public rows, sent her up to 3,000 messages from 35 different social media accounts, including threats to stab and burn her.

He was given a suspended 15-month prison sentence and a lifetime restraining order forbidding him from contacting her by Guildford Crown Court in Surrey in 2017.

During the candid podcast chat, Nicola also went on to talk about the trolling she has received for her stunning fiery red locks and pale complexion.

The singer was propelled to fame when she was 16-years-old after winning Popstars: The Rivals in 2002 with former girlband Girls Aloud.  

She said: ‘You’re just kind of put in front of a nation of people you know and it’s like you’ve gone from zero opinions to a nation of opinions. That’s a really odd thing. 

‘People used to say, ‘Oh did you get picked on for red hair’, no way! That was my superpower my whole life! I was really proud of it. It just wasn’t even a thought. 

‘Then when I was in the group I was like ‘Oh, it’s quite a thing that I’ve got red hair. Oh, its thing that I’m pale…” 

Nicola added that people were frustrated that she didn’t look like a ‘typical popstar’ and it was an ‘eye-opener for society’.

She continued: ‘People were more frustrated that I was in that position, but I didn’t look how I was supposed to look and that is a massive eye-opener for society, I think. 

‘That is a massive eye-opener for people to look in themselves and think, ‘Am I frustrated that she doesn’t look like a typical popstar? Why does that anger me?” 

Nicola sweetly added that she has always been inspired and supported by women throughout her career. 

The star revealed that Spice Girls’ Geri Horner, a judge on Popstars: The Rivals, always championed her from the start.

She said: ‘I just felt young, really young and I went up and I sang, and I did my thing and I remember Geri came running off and she was my favourite as well! 

‘So, I was just like “I don’t know what is happening right now!” My whole life has been like “I don’t know what is happening right now!”    

‘She was like “You have something so special and I’m rooting for you and you sound so good”. It’s funny, throughout my whole career, it’s always been women, from the very start. 

‘It’s always been a certain type of woman like Geri was always the one who championed me through Popstars: The Rivals.’ 

Nicola was recently revealed as Queen Bee, after she was crowned the winner of The Masked Singer UK. 

The Girls Aloud star finally removed her mask after beating Octopus and Hedgehog in the final, with the runners-up revealed as Katherine Jenkins and Jason Manford respectively.

Talking about her experience, Nicola likened it to Popstars: The Rivals as she was back to singing on national television every Saturday night.

She said: ‘It felt like a similar experience in the sense of the singing every Saturday night. It felt like a similar experience singing in front of the nation, doing the same thing yet with a mask on. 

‘I loved it. I honestly just love to sing all those massive songs and have fun with it and it being a game and no one knowing it’s you… It’s kind of fun you know!’

And Nicola nearly missed out on the opportunity after she failed to look at the email when it first came in.

She said: ‘I mean the email came in and I didn’t even look at it at first and then I think it was two weeks later that my manager was like, “Oh, can I get answer on this? I need to say yes or no like they’re chasing me”.

‘I was like let me read it again and then I looked at it and I was like, “Ok,” – I love the idea of the fact that it felt like 10/15 years ago, the prospect of it was that families sit down.

‘You’ve got the mother and father and the kids and grandparents and they’re all in a room and they’re all not on their phones and they’re guessing who this person is. 

‘I liked the family aspect of it and bringing people together for a TV show and it felt wholesome and fun…’

Laura Whitmore’s Castaway podcast is available on Apple, Spotify and all major podcast platforms.